What Do I Do If I Never Meet “The One”?
The thought of finding “the one” may conjure images of a grand sweeping romance that knocks you off your feet. Of fun date nights. Doing life together. Getting through all of life’s hardest moments with the greatest support system of your life.
Pop culture paints this picture of “the one.” It’s embedded into our DNA from the time we are toddlers to growing up. Almost all of us grew up watching people fall in love and find everlasting happiness on the screen and in books. It’s the ideal that many of us strive for. After all, who doesn’t want to spend their life with that one special person? Ok, there’s certainly those out there who don’t, but, that’s for another post entirely!
But, one can be the loneliest number. Once you begin dating, it opens up a whole can of worms. With every person you date or come across, you may become frustrated that you haven’t got that feeling yet. That deep, unquestionable feeling, you’ve finally found them. So what do you do? What can you do when this life you dream of seems so far out of reach?
Let Yourself Feel Sad
Not only are you frustrated with not finding “the one” yet, but you’re frustrated with yourself, too. It’s hard to want something so passionately, not knowing if you will ever get it.
It’s ok to be sad. It’s okay to grieve over a future you don’t know you’ll have. These feelings are completely normal, and honestly, most of us go through it at some point in our lives.
Working On Yourself Is Sometimes The Catapult To Get That Future
There’s an ideal that you will only be complete once you meet that special someone. As if your soul and heart are missing a piece of them that only another human can put together.
But, look at this way. Everything in life typically happens for a reason. We don’t always know the reasons, but that’s ok. It’s part of the human experience. Allow yourself to grieve and feel sad, but don’t stay in that place. Instead, look at what you can do during this time to become the best possible version of yourself. We all have our own stuff we need to work on and improve; none of us are perfect. If you haven’t met that special someone yet, use this time to work on you. We can’t predict the future, but we do have control over it.
It Helps You Figure Out Your Personal Priorities For The Future
You aren’t building a future with someone else, at least for right now. As much as you want to, for whatever reason, the timing just isn’t there for you. That’s ok. Instead, focus on YOUR future. What are your goals? What do you want to accomplish?
It’s hard coping with the idea that you may not meet someone. Not even “the one.” Just anyone in general. But, there is always hope for a future. If you spend the next five years single, what can you do on your own? Travel? Start your own business? Move to a completely new location? Move back to be closer to family?
You Aren’t Alone With Being Alone
One of the most frustrating experiences that we internally struggle with is when everyone around us is coupled up. Getting engaged, married, starting families. And there you are. Without any of it. It feels like an isolating experience, right? It may not be true with your immediate circle, but, being single is much more common than you would think. In a 2013 study, it was found that 35% of the adult population was single.
There are worse things in life than being alone. While that may not make you feel better, self-care and working on yourself can do wonders for your mind, body, and soul. You’ll feel more prepared for the future, regardless of your relationship status.
If you are struggling to cope with relationship issues, please reach out to me to begin the journey to better self-love.
